Ash Wednesday

Today is Ash Wednesday.  I did some looking around for a service to attend tonight.  I wanted to get off on the right foot and begin a journey of connecting with a new community.  (It's been awhile since I've been regularly attending any one church.) But nothing I found felt right.  I felt a little sad.  

After awhile, I realized that the receiving of the imposition of ashes on one's forehead is a deeply intimate and personal event.  How could I start with a new church tonight, not even knowing if it is where I want to be making a new church home, and open myself to such a personal experience with a crowd I do not know?

I've explored a few Lutheran communities in the last year or two, and found one in particular to be quite satisfying - but time and geographically prohibitive.  I found one close to home with good mission work going on - but not very nurturing for my spirit.

So, I decided rather than forcing myself to find a new community tonight, that instead, I would begin an intentional journey - one that begins with the 40 days of Lent, and continues thru crucifixion and resurrection and ascension.  This will be a time of searching, reflecting and connecting.  I am beginning this blog to commit myself to this journey.

In visiting this evening's scripture, I hear these words from Joel 2:

"Yet even now, says the LORD,
return to me with all your heart,
with fasting, with weeping, and with mourning;
rend your hearts and not your clothing."

It is easy to be caught up with the external matters in life - I've been overwhelmed by them lately!  Today, I begin to open my heart up again - to consider what it truly means to be one of God's children and to live in the world, while not of the world.